But whatever, it's still here has my voice when I have nobody to talk to. My wall to bounce ideas off. And maybe every so often I'll have useful posts that mean something.
Maybe I can start that now.
So I came across this blog about a girl who started powerlifting to lose a bunch of weight she gained while in college. It went through her progress from starting a gym to do a bunch of cardio and starve herself, to learning that she needed to actually eat more and lift with low cardio instead. Within a year, she had such drastic improvement, and I wanted to follow her continued progress because she was deadlifting/squatting/bench pressing SO MUCH MORE than me and she's 3 inches shorter with similar body structure.
However, her blog ends February of 2014. I almost want to contact her and go "HEY! WHAT HAPPENED?! ARE YOU STILL AWESOME?!" But maybe instead of all that, I can do my own progress reporting.
First, I want to share my goals. Because things are becoming blah in the Lauren world of fitness as of late. I felt like I was well on my way to ultramarathons and feeling good about it all until I took that big break. Now almost 12 weeks (really?) into training and I feel like I never want to run again. All my runs except maybe 3 have felt so shitty and boring and hateful. I'm so lost inside my head and feeling every ache, and generally hating anything about getting out of bed to go to something athletic.
I started going to a climbing gym in March as well and though I have been fairly good about going regularly (3-ish days/week average), that too is becoming stale. I have no motivation to get up at 5am to go before work and when I get off work, I want to go straight home and veg out or make out with my boyfriend.
Which makes me think I need another break for an undefined amount of time. I need to change gears. It scares me because I want to one day to some crazy ultramarathons, but at the same time if I'm not happy, am I really going to be able to? So this summer, I may go for mountain biking and I think I shall also powerlift my way to a physique I desire. In the winter, it will be working on getting better at snowboarding and super lifting.
Here's the planned schedule for the next 6 weeks at least:
Three powerlift days. Two climbing days. And still trying to keep with 5 running days, but I'm not sure I like that, I might have to drop back down to 4 days.
And that also leaves a couple mornings free to have coffee with the beau and afternoons with him on days he doesn't work. Lunch run days still mean I get home after 6 though but I try to stay up until 10 on days I don't have a 5am the next morning.
Other Things still need to figure out
Point being, we are trying to both eat as well as we can to keep doing the sports we want to do. We recently bought a pressure cooker for quick meals and a recipe book specifically geared toward athletes on the go (and food to make while we're on races): Feedzone Portables. I wasn't sure if to get the original Feedzone or the portables and if I had known portables was geared toward "race day food" I probably would have gotten the other. BUT, I'm all for portable food anyway, so what the hey, we'll make it work.
Anyway, it's for athletic people who need specific types of calories and I'm hoping to count macros and really get a good start on toning up and gaining some muscle where it will help my runs up big hills and mountains.
But food has always been hard for me. Or at least out of college it has been. I'm just so tired from work and running I rarely want to make anything. I'm hoping I'm not too tired on Sundays to do batch food making and meal prep. But who knows. Chris helps by making me dinner most nights and it's awesome. Maybe we just need to always make way too much for upcoming days. But I don't know how much he wants to measure grams of food like I'd like to do soon.
Whether or not I actually want to do this 50-mile race this year. I would love to be a badass and accomplish a 50-mile ultra barely more than 2 years after beginning to be a runner. But I've been so blah, that I wonder if I should change gears, start focusing on my lifts and start learning to mountain bike. Not like I want to do races so it'll always be no pressure. And maybe I just need to step back and reevaluate what I really want. All I said in the beginning, my one goal, was to do a marathon. And I accomplished that. So maybe I'm fine. Maybe I can keep running for fitness, but what do I really have to prove to anyone? I'm too extreme sometimes, but nobody knows to tell me to chill out. My motivations are my own and I'm also headstrong and stubborn, who would I really listen to?
So yeah, maybe after this Collegiate Peaks 25-mile race, I'll stop and just have fun this summer. There's so many great things going on in my life, how about I take some time to enjoy it all instead of killing myself over PRs and distance extremities?